New year, same old madness

And same old ups and downs. Whilst in my relationship nothing could be better (except the fact we´re living in different cities), other parts in my life are not working out that well. But let´s start from scratch!

New Year´s Eve
It´s been a lovely time of chocolate fondue, stupid TV shows, DVD and watching the fireworks on the bridge here in Wilhelmshaven. It´s been romantic and it´s been the best start into a year I ever had. Let it be this way for a lot of coming new year´s eves please! But cut out the wind and fire crackers therefore going wild and flying where they shouldn´t 😉

I am still getting used to everything, but I am making progress and more and more understand how to use the systems and how to export and import data and all of this. It´s a really slow process because it´s not too simple and self-explaining but I am giving my best.

Tonsilitis, here we come. I´ve been carrying it around in me for quite a while and always just pushed it away and oppressed it by being busy but then it cimply hit me this week and I ended up being unable to breathe and swallow and had to go and get antibiotics from the doctor as it simply didn´t get better at all. I really had planned on ditching antibiotics, but sometimes it´s not possible. So I am on bed rest and all I do is little walks when the sun´s out for a while.

Welcome to Wilhelmshaven and its weather fun. There´s been a while with hardly any hours of seeing the sun. and you more and more forgot how sun even looks like or feels like in the eyes as everything was just in different shades of grey, accompanied by varying amounts of wind.

As I´ve been signing up for a nyckelharpa course in May (aka retourning where it all started), I really have to kick ass now to not totally look like an idiot there. And the good thing is: the sound in my apartment is so much better than in Hamburg and I really try to play at least twice or three times a week…starting with basics again as I got a book for nyckelharpa playing for Christmas…


SwimBikeRun Training – Week 14 & 15 & 16

17.12.-23.12.2018 (Week 14)

This week I ditched my swim training because I felt like getting sick and that really was a show stopper for me, same goes for most of the days when it comes to my ab challenge. I haven´t fully given up on the ab challenge but only few days I actually managed to keep it up.

I also did some stretching, but not many times – I feel guilty because of that because it´s so necessary for my healing progress of the foot but I couldn´t be bothered. But at least I have more and more painfree or nearly painfree days…so there is still progress!

24.12.-31.12.2018 (Week 15)

Well, I´ve been lazy and all I did was a bit of walking and a bit of stretching and continuing my abs challenge. But the main training was…FOOD! Eating and relaxing, because recovery for mind and body is also important, especially when traveling a lot then body is struggling anyways.

01.01.-06.01.2019 (Week 16)

How to start into the new year? Yep, do the first swim training on january 2nd! 1750m, split to 1000m and 2 times 375m. First time swimming 1000m in one go, and I am having sore muscles and really was exhausted, thus I split the emaining 750m into two. Wasn´t keen on drowning 😉

I also went to gym for the first time in ages – some biking, stretching, some rowing and some weights. But I had to notice that I am really out of shape – long road to go, very long road. And a lot of patience needed.

but at least I´ve been pretty painfree this week, it´s going uphill. Maybe also because I started doing again all of my stretching for my foot, though it´s really annoying the hell out of me lately.

Bye bye half-marathon plans!

So right after my first half marathon, I also signed up for the half-marathon in 2019. I had no idea what was still coming for me after this decision and I had no idea that I wouldn´t be able to do any running until at least end of February (that´s the current plan right now).

My physiotherapist told me that I still gotta work hard on my foot´s health for around 5 more weeks, so there is an end to be seen but still it´s a while to go.

Which then let me do the math – if I started in March with training, and slowly getting back into running, I would have around 3,5 months to get to the shape I would need in order to successfully finish the half-marathon. Which is after that kind of injury pretty much a bad idea – I wanna go out there healthy and with a smile and not with a bad feeling and needing to fear I´ve been aiming right back at another long break.

It sucks and my ambitious heart breaks but I have resigned. Luckily I also booked an insurance so I will get 80% of the price I paid back. It doesn´t make up for the experience, it doesn´t make up for me being gutted about it.

But I want my body to give me many many many more runs, no matter which distance. and my body (and my physiotherapist) tells me that this is the road to go. Instead I will maybe do some more 10km runs or something like this, let´s just see what comes and what happens and everything.

It´s not like I am taking it easy, but I do it for myself. Because if I have learnt one thing during all the training and working out and during my runs – health comes first, and if you´re unsure if it´s a good idea to do it. Then ditch it. Because there is no such bullshit as defeat, there is no such thing as “omg you gave up because it hurt”. No, it´s about fucking listening to your body and if it tells you to stop it, you might want to think about doing so. At least I do. And I am proud I learnt that lesson.

Goals for 2019!

I like setting goals and then evaluate at the end of the year if I actually have been sticking to it – surely these are not all of my goals, but some others are too private to actually share here. I hope you understand.

But the following are the ones that I can share:

  • Work on my body
    And not with a focus on weight, but rather on strength and building a nie body that I feel comfy with, no matter the weight 🙂
  • Take part in a triathlon sprint
     I already booked my ticket for the competition in Wilhelmshaven. Time to explore new madnesses for myself!
  • Run 1 half-marathon
    I loved the first half marathon I have done and really wanna keep going, but depending on my foot this is an unlikely one. but the year has 12 months, so everything is possible.
  • Run 80km every month
    I need to train hard, not only for the triathlon but also for running at least one half marathon. Will be challenging in the winter months for sure!
  • Take part in one running competition every month
    I had that plan or goal already this year (aka 12 runs in 12 months) and had to pass it unfortunately. This time I will work stronger on it – hopefully healthy will also allow it…
  • Read 1 book every month
    …will be a tough one, but spending time on the train every month will give me the chance to rock this. If I am not falling asleep every time 😉 I really have to catch up all those unread books that are (im(patiently sitting on my desk and are waiting for me to read them!
  • Eat out once every month
    I am a greedy being and never want to spend money on it, but I wanna get out and explore restaurants, no matter if alone or with my boyfriend.
  • Visit at least 1 North Sea island
    …a long weekend on one the islands that I´ve only known from their names and nothing more. Let´s see which one it´s gonna be, I haven´t decided yet.
  • Attend at least 3 medieval festivals
    …simply because I bought the season ticket and only then it would make sense. Plus I want to get around and meet knew and known faces and maybe also be photographing a band or two there.
  • Buy veggies at the weekly market once a month
    Because I always wanted to buy local but never had the time, or will, or money. So I wanna change that and suport local stuff!
  • Take part in at least one nyckelharpa course
    I signed up for the course in Altenmünster again, just where it all started last time! And I am SO looking forward to it. Cannot wait!

Bucket List 2018 goes 2019

My bucket list was not really emptied this year – shame on me! And I am really gonna be working on emptying it more in 2019. Simply because it´s time for crazy shit, and changes.

I already have changed quite something in 2018, and 2019 will be not anything less exciting, I am sure about this!

These are the ones I was able to cross out in 2018:

  • Color your nails each in a different color
  • Be silent for a full day
  • Go and see a soccer match at the stadium
  • Don´t eat sweets for a whole week
  • Clean up your wardrobe
  • Set up an IKEA shelf yourself
  • Eat vegan for a whole week

And these the ones I haven´t had on my list but the were fulfilled anyways:

  • Find your fairy tale prince and fall in love head over heels
  • Learn to close the zipper of your dress on your own and without any help
  • Drop a langer (and not not just once…)
  • Keep a secret to yourself

So this is what´s on my plate for coming year!
Go and read, and laugh about some – it´s sometimes maybe random, but still. I love random stuff 😀

#1 – Learn how to bind a necktie
#2 – Spend one night in an expensive luxury hotel
#3 – Do it yourself – sewing. At least 4 pieces of clothing or other things
#4 – Go to the airport and spontaneously book a weekend trip
#5 – Place a bet at horse racing
#6 – Go and bath naked in a lake
#7 – Get a new tattoo
#8 – Cut off your hair
#9 – Dance in the rain
#10 – Do a photoshoot
#12 – Tell yourself that you´re beautiful
#13 – Leave a love message for someone
#14 – Be a femme fatale for a night 😉
#15 – Take a ballet lesson


2018 – look back at it!

 As ever year, I am looking back on 12 crazy months that once again changed so much in my life. Those 12 months changed me, and many aspects of my life in many ways that I didn´t think of when 2018 had started!


I was injured, no running, instead only alternative training and it was frustrating and terribly painful – mentally as well as physically.

One week of eating vegan
I did this challenge and managed to eat vegan for a week and was really surprised how exhausting that can be – it´s crazy in which foods there is something that makes it not vegan…a great experience, but nothing I´d like to be doing on the long run.


Versengold in Bremen
I did some sightseeing frst and discovered beautiful corners of the city, especially the old part of the city. So beautiful. The area where the show was, was less impressive, but well, the show was though. I am a big fan of their ballads, so it´s been an emotional evening for me”. More **here**

Versengold in Leipzig
Because once is not enough, I travelled to Leipzig to see the show again and did some sightseeing – even though I had 39°C of fever and was sick as a dog. And even sicker Afterwards. Details? Check **here**


Apocalyptica in Glasgow
I wanted to see the guys a last time on this tour, also because Antero was not gonna be with them afterwards anymore once this touring cycle is over. And it´s been a nerve wrecking trip because “oh so much snow” has been coming over Glasgow before I travelled there and everything was a bit chaotic. But I had a great time  with a fellow German Apocalyptica fan, did quite some sightseeing in all the snow and then enjoyed the show in a venue without heating…
The concert **here** and the sighseeing **here**

Wandsetaler Runde (run) 
My first “competititve” run, and I was totally devastated but also happy because I for myself reached an amazing time on the 10km, but was frustrated about how strong everyone else in the starting field was going. More **here**


Nyckelharpa course in Altenmünster
After waiting for so long, I finally got the chance to do the course and play this instrument – it´s been a weekend full of practice, frustration and joy and everything in between. And will happen again next year! Details? **here**

Versengold in Wilhelmshaven
The day where I fell in love with this city, and fell in love again with the sea and had the decision in my head that this was hopefully gonna be the place where I was gonna be living. Oh and the show was nice too. Read about it **here**


Abu Dhabi
What a vacation! Up to 43°C, a totally new culture, new eating habits but so exciting and so worth all the money! And too many new experiences to link to just one or two blong entries!

Fanclub meeting with Versengold
Not planned, but decided on a last minute feeling to attend, and it´s been a nice evening of re-finding old friends and meeting new people and having amazng food and drink!

Medieval Market in Hohenwestedt
Pretty much on short nice I decided to go to Hohenwestedt for the medieval market – simply because the weather was looking good and I had rented a car anyways, so why not go? Read how I liked it **here**

B2Run (run)
I started in the name of Runners Point where I also always bought my shoes, so it was pretty cool, also starting in a group though I was simply too slow for most of them. How it went in detail, check **here**

Rahlstedter Wandserunde (run)
A great run! I started off as being one of the last ones but in the end passed by quite a few ones – probably, from the surprise factor when it comes to my pace, it was the run! And so many great people – but more about it  **here**

Bought my nyckelharpa
It came all of a sudden, a few emails and calls later I owned a nyckelharpa and picked it up in Bremen. What a sudden move, just after I had ordered a new one, someone had to give up playing and sold hers…so sad for her but so great for me!


BKK Mobil Oil Run Fun Day (run)
It´s been a run with a not so amazing route, and it didn´t go that amazingly well but pulling through is important – no giving up, forget it! More about it **here**

Nothing More in Hamburg
The boys were back in town, and I did some “catering” and besides that was just a photographer this time, so no interview. It´s been a great show and really loved it. It´s always so nicely cozy in that venue and being so close to the stage mkaes it extra explosive! Read about it **here**


Hella Half marathon
I still don´t really know what to say – because I am still stunned I made it, still no words for what a great experience that has been! Read some more words about this “first time” **here**

Vacation in Southern Germany
aka Family time and -post-halfmarathon-recovery! Great day of sightseeing, being up the Zugspitze, a lot of sauna and just turning off mind and body for a while!

Tough Mudder 5km
First time there´s been a Tough Mudder in a city edition, and these 5km were pretty relaxed and really fun – just the right thing for the time after my half marathon. Read more **here**

Signed my new work contract
…it at first didn´t feel like a tough decision, but then in NOvember leaving my agency was a painful step to go…


Signed my rental contract in Wilhelmshaven
I checked out exactly one apartment in Wilhelmshaven and for this one also signed the rental contract! Love at first sight!

Hella Inselparklauf
I felt tired and then stomach sick during the run and thus ran less rounds than initially planned, but at leat I pushed through once again and managed to even have a not so bad time on these kilometers. But the feeling could´ve been better. Read more **here**

Heldenlauf (run)
A run with a lot of running up and down and many many stairs that made your legs burn. Great experience, even though there´s quite some things that could be improved! Wanna know more? read **here**


Medieval market in Hamburg
The last one in Hamburg – sucha  pity, still cannot get over it to be honest. Bu again it´s been a great time with fun people and nice music, nice food and drink…Always something to enjoy! Read more **here**

Versengold concert in Worpswede

Last run of the season – because it wouldn´t have many any sense to keep running when being in pain, so once last time I enjoyed running and enjoyed that competition feeling and crossing the finish line! More **here**

Bought a car
…on my birthday 😉 Did a test drive with the car and on the same day bought the car…all of a sudden I had a car that I picked up in October. Still feels surreal! Check it out **here**


Versengold – Anniversary shows
Twi days, two venues, too many hours of waiting in the cold outside, two times frontrow, two shows and no voice left! Wanna know the details? Then check my blog entry about it **here**

Getting the keys and renovating my apartment
…because the “renovated” in my rental contract was a joke. Like, a really bad one. My dad and I spent a full weekend cleaning and coloring the walls and everything. It was successful and now looks amazing, but still. When I got the keys, I was so upset about the condition of the apartment I was between crying and breaking down and getting anger attacks. Read my rant **here**


Last day at my former agency
…and leaving was so much harder than I expected…no words can describe that!

Moved to Wilhelmshaven
It´s been a week of packing all boxes, 1,5 weeks of unpacking and in between the moving day, the moving out of my Hamburg apartment, alot of paper work, chaos, stress, exhaustion, emotion…it´s been a big step that I could´ve not done without my dad who helped me so much!

Fell in love
No other words needed. Sometimes love comes at times where you expect it least. Waking up with a smile on your face and falling asleep with a smile on your face is the best thing.


Started a new job
…and started commuting by car, which is more exhausting than I had expected. Everything´s new, everything´s unknown, and it will take time to get used to it. Let´s see how it´ll go!

Christmas party at the company
…the food was okay, the colleagues nice. But it was simply too big for me and I was too tired – knowing I still had half an hour of drive home I left rather early, to be honest. And fell straight into bed afterwards!

Feuerengel concert in Wilhelmshaven
A friend put me on the guestlist, and though I am no fan of Rammstein, this tribute band stole my heart. Still totally surprised that this actually happened to be honest. Never expected that. Read more **here**

Christmas in Southern Germany
Two long trainrides (each about 9-9,5h hours one direction), and relaxing and cozy days with a lot of good food, sauna, a fire place and of course family!

New Year´s Eve – not alone
…and celebrating it with the best person that I could have at my side 🙂

Merry 18 hours of trainride

Alternative headline: Merry Christmas , happy eating, enjoying the time with family and relaxing!

Or: what you do to be with your family, having a great time!

Except for those mentioned 18 hours of trainride. It kinda sucks if you are living really far up north in Germany and you gotta travel 9h one way to get to your family for Christmas. So this is why on 24th I had the joy of getting up really early and have my go – Wilhelmshaven to Oldenburg, Oldenburg to Munich, Munich to Weilheim, Weilheim to Hohenpeißenberg. When looking at it on the map it’s really one time from north to south in Germany.

But what can I do? Driving by car was no option as it would’ve taken even longer and would’ve been even more expensive. But I would have not have to bother with annoying spoiled brats in the first class if the train. Because yes, I booked first class because I wanted to be left alone, and able to sleep. In the end that didn’t quite work both trips, mostly because children were just too noisy. But let me not get started on this, because I could write down an endless rent.

So once I arrived in Hohenpeißenberg on Christmas Eve I was pretty tired and only certain energy giving drinks made me stay alive. And then…well, I knew we were not having the classical Christmas tree but when I came in I literally passed by the tree whilst searching for it. I am no gonna post a “full body” shot here, but we’ll, I will put it nicely: a nice Christmas tree looks slightly different. In the end I was just laughing about that xD

After a quick shower and changing clothing I felt more alive again, some relaxing and I was ready for Christmas to really start though there was still no snow. Another year without white Christmas. Sigh. At least the view on the mountains gave it a nice touch! And here is what I got for Christmas:

  • An FC Köln themed car license plate holder
  • a pillow for my time in the bathtub
  • a book of sheet music for nyckelharpa
  • a humorous book on triathlon
  • a medal holder for all my running medals
  • an IKEA voucher (yeses, decoration here I come!)
  • a self-made calendar for 2019
  • the latest Apocalyptica live CD/DVD

But to be honest for me it’s just as great to see how happy everyone needs was about my presents as when I unwrapped mine.

And after all this exhausting work came…EXACTLY! Food. It was time for raclette again and afterwards I really felt like I was pregnant with cheese. But it was so good and once a year you can just do and enjoying till the very last bit(e)! The little ice cream later on then was the final thing to have on that day, afterwards I dropped into bed and slept like dead – after having been awake for like 18h and having had a bad night before that was nothing surprising.

The next morning I woke up just right in time for brunch with my family (feels so nice to not eat alone!), but I could’ve continued sleeping still – the mountain air just made me permanently tired and hungry. Later the day we went for a walk and afterwards enjoyed the time next to the fireplace with me napping and reading my book and just turning my mind off. I simply love the sound and feel of fire…then my aunt left, and after anotger nice dinner all I did was drop into sauna and from sauna into bed. Another dreamless night because I was just so tired!

And then, my last full day in Hohenpeißenberg- breakfast, a longer walk in the sunset, driving to the gas station for some bread rolls because we ran out of them, packing, chatting and just spending so much time with my book in front of the fireplace. So calm, so peaceful. And I even nearly finished my book (I finished the last pages just on the train back to Wilhelmshaven).

And then one last time: sauna! And when looking at the watch I nearly died, it was after 11pm and I had to get up at 5am in order to be able to still comfortably have breakfast and pack some food for the train ride and everything. So yes, it was a short night and the trip back home started with noticing the times for my trains had been changed – and not exactly to the positive.

But you know, running with a heavily backpack and suitcase are a good sports just after Christmas to burn a few of the calories you had too much over the past days hahahaha yes, that was sarcasm. And I haven´t been running just once, but several times and my lung didn´t appreciate that all – on my way to Oldenburg I was really struggling with asthamtic problems after running again and it´s been no fun.

I was dead tired and then the pressure on my lung…and from Oldenburg to Wilhelmshaven I had an elderly lady who couldn´t stop talking to me. I was really freaking out inside, and so happy when I was able to do close the door behind me. A few seconds of peace before grocery shopping started and even before 8pm I fell into bed and into a deep sleep.

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On Instagram I´ve often been asked how my weightloss is going and or why it is not going too well. Instagram is full of “omg we need to be slim and it´s the number 1 topic in my life” and I noticed one thing during 2018: weightloss has not been my number 1 topic in life anymore. I am not even willing to really put it on number 1 and have my whole life circle around it. It will always be a big part of my life that I need to watch my weight, but I am not willing to focus on it anymore.

Why? Simple – because life offers so much great things that always pressuring instead of loving yourself is just not healthy and a waste of time to say the least. Also I learned one thing – I´ve been running a half marathon and many more runs successfully this year, being, what medicine says, overweight. Yes, it would be easier with less weight but it´s still doable – and instead of starving myself, I wanna change something.

And that “something” is my workouts, because I wanna SHAPE my body, build up more muscles, form my body. And not torture it with strict weightloss imagination anymore. Simply because during the year I had to notice it´s not working for me anymore. I haven´t lost any weight when looking at my weight from the start of January and now – surely there´s been plenty ups and downs in between and I thought it was going down with baby steps, but in the end it wasn´t.

So maybe a shift of focus will help my body and mind and refresh everything. And maybe the weightloss will happen, who knows. But all I want for 2019 is working on my look – also because I was surprised I haven´t seen any change if I had 4kg less or more.

So yes, 2019 will be all about shaping, building up my muscles, gaining strength!

Merry Christmas!

Dear everyone,

enjoy your Christmas days if you´re celebrating Christmas – and if you aren´t celebrating Christmas, enjoy these hopefully peaceful days with those who are close to you!

I am currently still sitting on the train (precicely, I am doing so since around 5am) and am enjoying the madness and chaos that comes with the German train company.

I cannot wait to arrive and then have Christmas start properly – with wrapping my Christmas gifts (no, I haven´t done so beforehand), relaxing, a part of my family, a lot of food, sauna…


Concert: Feuerengel (Wilhelmshaven, 21.12.2018)

“I thought you maybe should´ve seen this” – this is the explanation on why I ended up watching a Rammstein tribute band. Me. Rammstein tribute.

Me, the person who is in a big disgust mode when even thinking about Till Lindemann and being probably very anti Rammstein in general. But when I was invited to check out Feuerengel, I thought “I won´t be watching and videos, I am not gonna read reports, I am not gonna spoil it”. Why? This never comes even close to the real concert experience, and I just wanted to go in there and see if I liked it.

It´s been my first concert since I moved here and it felt just great needing not even 10min to get there and back home. The amazing sides of living in a smaller city than Hamburg ^^

When I arrived doors were already open and I had to do a little search where to watch the show from – being small and having a sold out venue doesn´t usually go well together, but I found myself a nice spot at the side of the stage. Sitting. With an amazing view on the stage and also the crowd. To be honest I had been surprised when I had read in advance that the show was sold out…but soon I knew why!

I´ve had a blast during the concert, right from the start till the end – but the northern german crowd once again needed a bit of time to really embrace the fun. As usual, and that´s where I notice I am totally not from here at all xD I totally turned of fthe mind, reality had to stay outside for the duration of the show and that´s just been what I needed so badly!

A great sound even where I was sitting, a great setlist, so much fun to watch on stage and in front of the stage and I´ve always been a fan of pyrotechnics but this time really my heart stopped a couple of beats here and there when they came at unexpected moments. Jeeeeez, I am not easily scared but this really nearly made my drop my phone I had in my hand for filming a bit of the show!

So yeah, I went in skeptical – I went out with a huge grin on my face and being surprised that even someone like me who isn´t into Rammstein could love this show so much –  and I cannot wait for December 2019 when there will be even 2 shows here in Wilhelmshaven! Bring it on!