Day X+58/59/60/61 – Just go with the flow


22.10.2016 -Day X+58
Saturday, is couple´s time for me. It´s time to turn off the mind and do funny things, e.g. playing a new cardgame that we had purchased. Have some good food, watch TV series and and and…felt good, especially in those times where my mind is everywhere but not focussed on the positive things in life.

23.10.2016 – Day X+59
Half a couple´s day and then doing mostly some house scores and  editing photos and napping on the couch…yes, that motivated I actually was. Buuuuut I also went for a run, a small one as I didn´t go running for quite a while and I know from the past that my lung is not really approving cold air at all – and that´s still the case, it hurt in my lung even though the time for my round was better than it had been before. And that even though a big part of my path was muddy so I was partially not even able to run but rather walk quickly…The rain just fucks it all up…

24.10.2016 – Day X+60
Yay, two calendar months have passed since I started this blog series, as it seems. It doesn´t feel like it, as wounds seem to be still as bloody and open as before… well, not fully but still.

So I had my job center appointment today, and decided that I will be doing the offered course no matter if I get my money or not. It´s an escape from the pressure of searching and having hope and being frustrated, and of course also and not any less a huge chance for me. I could never afford doing this course on my own.

Also, I am still waiting for the callback from the agency because of the decision on my unemployment benefits until Christmas…let´s see if they will call me tomorrow. If not, I will call them any be annoying again. I just need clarity. Also to apply for some other money…time is running and running…

25.10.2016 – Day X+61
So yeah, yesterday, shortly before going to bed, I figured the day had been too boring, so stepped onto one of my needles needed to apply the materials together…stuck it up my foot and yeah, it still hurts. Had actually planned to go for a run but as I can hardly walk without the pain spreading into my whole foot, all I did was quick food shopping and then resting the foot and waiting for the job agency to finally call back.

In the meantime of course there was house scores and even more of it, and searching for the fabrics for my dress for which I already ordered the instructions…yes, I am going forward fast – it is worth a try, I need the pressure and the challenge I think, because I guess I am better than what I currently guess I´d be…but finding matching fabrics is not even so easy…

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