The lesson was…well, let´s be honest, I was frustrated. And still am. Simply because I felt so secure and I thought I was going strong, my ego was doing good. Until it came to this damned roll forward that we learned at the end of that lesson and my brain just blocked. Whilst during my childhood I was always enoying any kinds of rolls, no matter if forward or backward, high up or on the floor…and now I am dying when I gotta do this 1.5m up from the floor. Again there was this fear of my arms not being able to hold me, the fear or of falling right onto my damned face. I was full body stiff, like I had a stick stuck up my ass. I think I´ve never been that close to crying during a lesson because I was so full of hate for myself. Sometimes I end up overly motivated, and my perfectionism is just standing in my way again. Most of the others in the course managed to do it seemingly without problem…didn´t make it any better.
Alrighty, at the playtime I had just one goal – to minimize my fear of the move that you can see on the video below – yes, I am recording myself to spot mistakes, like I figured I tend to bend both knees and make it therefore even harder than it would be if I did it correctly like I nearly do in that video. I struggle with sliding my hands down enough during the move, and thuse stretching and bending my back backwards like in the end of that video is really hard. I somehow need to fix this problem, yet I am not having the slightest idea how, because sliding in the hoop with tape around it is impossible. You might say I shoudl just take one without tape then, right? Easy said. But thanks to my hands getting sweaty really fast, I struggle with all other figures then because I lose grip pretty quickly. So I need to adapt and somehow make it work. Gotta get creative there.