06.06.2017 – Day X+286
It´s just…you know, it´s hard for me to be fully back from Finland and back in Hamburg with heart and soul, I knew it´s not gonna be easy but somehow I had hoped it would not be too bad but here I am – struggling…and I really want to know my exam results. I am a terribly impatient person at times, especially when it comes to my future…hopeless case, aka me.
07.06.2017 – Day X+287
Did my job interview via Google Hangout today, and I though it really went well, the other person was nice and it´s been a good and comfortable talk, but still I cannot really estimate how my chances look like…maybe it´s also better that I do not even try to do so anymore. Instead ignore the nagging voice in my head, and give the best you can…also did some sports and everything, some food shopping and such – the evil necessities…
08.06.2017 – Day X+288
I woke up after a night full of insomnia, and turning from one side to the other in my bed and not knowing how to end this misery. And the day simply continued as crappy as it had started, as the job interview I had really went THAT bad that I would state it´d been the worst one I have had so far. And that even though I would have so loved to have this job – I know it´s over and I will not be getting invited to a second row, but now can do. Only try and forget it all. The afternoon then was better, as I went to my hoop playtime to catch up with the stuff the course did in the lesson I had missed during my finland stay – and what can I say, it´s gone better than expected, even though with some stuff I know I will have to work on very intensively, because it´s not my cup of tea.
09.06.2017 – Day X+289
So I had my test working which went well but in the end…let´s just not talk about it, it´s maybe better because I am not someone to whine about the own situation or anything, I just feel like shoving it into the category “same shit as always” and forgetting about it, but then got the “no” for another job that I really wanted to get so badly…what a shit. Really. But no can do, and my boyfriend managed to cheer me up – we had good food, bought add-on packs for Sims 4 and simply had a nice and relaxed evening.
10.06.2017 – Day X+289
Back at home, I was struggling still with some backpain that had magically appeared and I really have no idea where it came from all of a sudden. But I went for a run anyways, and the time…let´s put it this way, it´s been a run to forget! I haven´t had such a shitty time per kilometer ever before, and I felt terrible afterwards – just when I had gotten into the right flow, I had to cross the railroad and then was stuck there waiting to pass for like 8 minutes and then was all cold in regards of my muscles. And the rest of the run was torture, and I was happy when I was able to hop into a hot bubbling bath…